Honestly, I'm a little scared to go home for Thanksgiving. My mom is disappearing and it hurts a lot.
In some respects it's like she's already gone. She can't use the phone to call me, I don't think she remembers TO call me. When I call and she answers she doesn't have much to talk about or can't remember what she did that day. Sometimes I'm not sure if she thinks about me during the day, or wonders what I'm up to. I'm out of her sight so I'm out of her mind.
In some respects it feels like she's already gone. That happy, bubbly person isn't around anymore. No cheerful smile, no friendly wave in passing, just a husk is left.
I'm scared to go home because I don't know what I'll find. Last time she didn't recognize me at first. Will she recognize me now? Was that a fluke or is being forgotten what I get to look forward to?
One woman's journey through life.
